What I Learned This Week: I'm Tired of Listening to Your Hate

This week I learned just how hateful people can be. I listened and watched as people complained and argued and wagged flags of hatred at one another. The funny thing is, even the flags that were supposed to be declaring love proclaimed in loud voices and upraised fists hate for their oppressors and a vanity in overcoming them. The flags I saw this week wore stars, bars, stripes and rainbows,  silver and gold crests pinned to uniform shirts, N-words, and black leather covers. Each of the flags flies over hearts of hatred. 

Inasmuch as people continue to exert their right to fly the flags of hatred, I have decided not to fly my flag at all. My flag is no better than any of the others. It displays a one sided view of what and whose I am. So instead of flying a flag of self-admiration. I have decided instead to carry an ever changing and morphing flag of you. My determination is to bare a flag of affirmations for the people around me. They are not my beliefs and ideals that I need to force into your life and into your airspace, it is my love. I chose to move under the flag of you and let it be filled with my adoration of you. I chose to operate all of my business under the flag of you and truly it doesn't even matter what you are, what you believe, what you identify with, or what you don't. This week I learned to love you in spite of our differences. I learned to love you no matter what you believe. I learned to love you no matter what you do. I may not like your actions and you may not like mine, but under the flag of you it's not about me. It's only about the love that I must have in my heart for the people around me.

The Bible says to love my neighbor as myself. So I have decided that the words that come out of my mouth and influence people will be loving words, uplifting words, empowering words. I will share words of love and compassion. Your flags are not symbols of nations, they are symbols of separation. I no longer chose to acknowledge them. We are much more than a nation under God, we are a people under Him, neither Jew nor Gentile, slave or free, male nor female, we are one under Christ (Gal. 3:28). 

So when you see me, don't be surprised about the flag that I have raised high above my head and how it seems to resonate in you. It won't be a flag that you recognize but it will be oh, so familiar. 

1 John 4:19-20, "19 We love because he first loved us. 20 Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen,cannot love God, whom they have not seen."

1 Timothy 2:1, "First of all, then, I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people, for kings and all who are in high positions, that we may lead a peaceful and quiet life, godly and dignified in every way. 3 This is good, and it is pleasing in the sight of God our Savior, 4 who desires all people to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth."

What I Learned This Week: I Can Be What I Want to Be

Actually, I didn't learn that this week. I knew that I could be whatever I wanted to be. What I really learned is that I can choose not to be who I am. It is a confusing thing I may have to explain to my children one day with the hashtag #transracial.

For the last 22 years I have been trying to teach my children to be proud of who they are; the beautiful and talented creations that God made. I have encouraged them to reach into themselves and dream. To think the possibilities endless. I have encouraged the drawing of cartoons, the telling of stories, the bouncing of balls, the blowing against reeds, the testing of new recipes, and the bellowing of songs. What I have failed to encourage is the denial of self. I have failed to teach them to make changes to God's perfect creation. I have failed to tell them that sometimes God makes mistakes and they have every right to correct Him. I have failed to encourage them to turn their noses up against everything that they are for their own infinite knowledge and for the succession into what they feel is best.

Unfortunately, I have taught my children that their hair and their skin are beautiful. That their culture is theirs to embrace. I have taught them that we have a history embedded in a history and it is rich and dynamic and nothing to be ashamed of. I have taught them that they can unashamedly be all of who they are. I never told them to try to be anyone else.

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What I Learned This Week: Something About Reaching My Destination

It isn't the determination required to get there as much as it is the destination at which you arrive. We are all going somewhere. Some faster, some slower, some with detours and some straight away. It may be with and it may be without determination, knowledge and forethought. Some travel through life going with the ebbs and flows, never paddling with purpose, but being pulled by the tide. Others stroke with ferocity, fighting every wave, pushing through.

This week, I learned that I am somewhere in the middle of the two extremes. I'm motivated to move myself along but when the current is rough I float. Feeling defeated and deflated I float along waiting for the next move of the ocean. Something that piques my interest and inspires me once again to take up oars and paddle. Moving toward an unknown mark. Feeling like Abraham; not knowing but trusting and enjoying the course.

What I learned this week, as I stepped out of the boat and into my current destination, is that no matter what the seas may seem like, no matter how deep and wide, no matter how tall the waves, I will get there. I will stand on dry land and bask in the sunshine. I will, no matter how hard the world tries to tell me different and prove me wrong, in spite of my own doubts and fears, be where I am destined to be. It is a comfortable place. It is a place that has been prepared for me. It is a place where I realize all that I have been given and I am able to bring all that I am.

I also learned to anchor my boat at the shore. This isn't my final destination. Much more and much greater landing spots are ahead.